The thinnest party season on earth

How to survive Christmas in the age of Ozempic - when you're the only who's still eating

This party season everyone is thin. Clavicles rise from party dresses, cheekbones are sculpted, middle-aged waists are waspish once again, whilst arms I’d once describe as ‘peachy’ are now long and sinewy.

‘Ozempic,’ my friend told me before trotting out a list of well known names who are now all 10 kilos lighter thanks to the semaglutine ‘weight loss’ jab. ‘Don’t believe all the gym selfies…’

For the record, I don’t have an issue with those on Ozempic. In fact I know plenty of people who have struggled with their weight for years who now claim to have their lives back. ‘Now I’m not thinking about food all the time I can do and think about so much more,’ one woman told me.

But I am jealous. Let me explain…